Why do we grieve?

The book Grief Works by Julia Samuel shares some thoughts that may be helpful when questioning the pain of grief.

Pain is the agent of change

Even of we want to avoid it. Or try to push it away, as modern cultures often tell us is the best way.

Grief demands time & endurance.

Alternating ‘letting go’ with ‘holding on’ is something we need to learn to live with.

Julia explains that there are pillars of strength that support us in grief (and across our lives). We need to tend to these pillars across the months and years:

• Our relationship with the person who died

• Our relationship with our self

• The ways we express grief

• Time

• Mind and body

• Limits (I would say Boundaries too)

• Structure (or routine)

• Focusing (responding mindfully to your emotions and how they are expressed in the body)

These pillars and more can be the focus of helpful therapy when grieving.